Buy the Ticket, Take the Ride

Reading this book has taken over my life during the past two weeks. Oh my my my! I haven't devoured a book with this much voracity since reading Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas five or six years ago. NOM NOM NOM NOM.

Ilium takes place in an epic (yes, epic) overlap of ancient history and the far, far future. It's a multi-pronged story about Greek gods and goddesses (at least, beings who assume this classical role), the individuals the gods resurrect to have observe their divine influence in progression of The Battle of Troy, Post-Humans and MORAVECS* (*autonomous, sentient, biomechanical organisms seeded throughout the outer solar system by humans during the Lost Age) in the far future who grow weary and concerned with the harmful quantum footprints that these same gods are leaving on space and time from their lavish home on the summit of Mount Olympos - the highest point on a terraformed planet Mars...

Flaring tempers. Honor. Defiance. Luck. Robots obsessed with human literature. Hard Science. Graphic battle narration. Yeah, I'm in it to win it, folks.

Well-written, too - Props to Dan Simmons. You'd think that a story which ping-pongs between 1200 B.C. and some unspecified date in the far future would be a disorienting nightmare of a read. NAY! Simmons has crafted a smooth, textured and fun story to read. I've also gained some awesome insight into how a tale can be told. This is my first exposure to Dan Simmons, but most certainly will not be the last novel of his that I dive into - other than Olympos, the concluding half of this story, that much is a given.


Here's an excerpt from one of my favorite parts of Ilium:

“Open your eyes,” said Savi.

He did so, wildly grabbing the sonie for support with both hands a second later. Everything within his sight had been transformed. The nearby trees he had been ignoring except to borrow their shade were now towering complexities – transparent, layer upon layer of pulsing, living tissue, dead bark, vesicles, veins, dead inner material showing structural vectors and rings with columns of flowing data, the moving green and red of life – needles, xylem, phloem, water, sugar, energy sunlight. He knew that if he could read the flowing data, he would understand exactly the hydrology of the living miracle that was that tree, know exactly how many foot-pounds of pressure it was taking to osmotically raise all that water from the roots – Daeman could look down and see the roots under the soil, see the energy exchange of water from soil into those roots and the long voyage, hundreds of feet, from roots to the vertical tubules raising that water – hundreds of feet vertically! Like a giant sucking from a straw! – and then the lateral motion of the water, molecules of water in pipelines only molecules wide, out along branches fifty, sixty, seventy feet wide, narrowing, narrowing, life and nutrients in that water, energy from the sun…

Daeman looked up and saw sunlight for the discrete rain of energy it was – sunlight striking pine needles and being absorbed, sunlight striking the humus beneath his feet and warming the bacteria there. The world around him was a torrent of information, a tidal wave of data, a million micro-ecologies interacting all at once, energy to energy…

Gasping, almost gagging, Daeman whirled away, trying to shut off this vision, but everywhere was the complexity – the tagged and streaming ebb and flow of energy being passed, nutrients being absorbed, cells being fed, molecules dancing in the transparent trees, and breathing soul and sky ablaze with its rain and surge of sunlight and radio messages from the stars.

Daeman clasped his hands over his eyes, but too late; he’d looked at Savi – the old woman, but also a galaxy of life. Life nested in the flashing neurons of her brain behind that grinning skull and firing like lightning on the string of shocks along her retinal nerve and in the millions upon billions of living forms in her gut, busy and indifferent all, and – trying to look away, Daeman made the mistake of looking down at himself, into himself, past himself at his connection to the air and ground and sky…

“Off!” said Savi; Daeman’s mind echoed the command.

The brilliant midday sunlight bouncing off the trees and needle strewn soil suddenly seemed as dark as midnight to Daeman. His legs ceased to work. Gasping, Daeman slid along the edge of the somie and collapsed to the ground, rolling onto his stomach, arms extended, palms pushed flat, face pressed against pine needles.

Savi crouched next to him and patted his shoulder. “It’ll go away in a minute,” she said softly.
Quoted from Ilium by Dan Simmons

EUIII Muscowy Chapter 2 - The Barbed Web of Diplomacy

The Grand Campaign
Chapter One - In media Res

Click to play and listen while reading:


Chapter 2: The Barbed Web of Diplomacy

Muscowy, 1511 AD. A nation in the crux of its history. A rising power wedged between Western European technological progression and the advancing might of Asia’s Golden Horde – whose single-minded objective to conquer the European peninsula is impeded in large by the lands of Muscowy.

It has been a frantic ten years, wherein Muscowy has been built through warfare and the powers of diplomatic persuasion. Through the course of events we have become enmeshed in the fabric of local diplomacy. Alliances have been forged. Our enemies continue their tactful opposition. And it is here, through Diplomatic Actions, that Europa Universalis III sets itself apart as a strategy game.

Here are brief descriptions to some of the diplomatic actions relevant to this scenario:

Casus Beli – A legitimate (a term that is used loosely) and just cause for declaring war on another country. Declaring war without a Casus Beli destroys your reputation amongst other countries and quickly earns you a lot of enemies.
Proclaim Guarantee – Gives a Casus Beli against those who declare war on the selected country.
Send Warning – Gives a Casus Beli if the selected country declares war
Royal Marriage – Greatly improves relations between countries. This action may prove to be a messy affair (sometimes intentionally) when either one of the rulers passes away. The consequences are fortuitous but wars of succession are commonplace, as we shall shortly see.

Currently, this is where some of Muscowy’s diplomatic engagements lie.

Our primary concern is nurturing a relationship with Poland. They have come to our aid in the past, and it is critical that we maintain a good standing so that we may not have to face our enemies alone. And as such, it is important to understand that there are two critical aspects to diplomacy: (1) diplomacy can work both ways! And (2) the effects of diplomacy can bring about two unique consequences:

- It can provide unforeseen opportunities of growth that can only be answered by swift and decisive action.
- On the other hand, reactions from diplomatic exchanges can be far-reaching, and the results of which can catch you completely off guard and unprepared.

And currently, interestingly enough, Muscowy finds itself in both situations. As it has happened, through the barbed web of diplomacy we were entangled into being a key player in the:


And this is how diplomacy has caught Muscowy off guard…

Here’s how the lines have been drawn for this conflict: There are two tiers of enemy involvement. The first tier involves a central European powerhouse: France. Throughout this current campaign as Muscowy, Denmark has been frequently sending us requests to enter into a royal marriage, and we’ve always declined. The fact that we are currently in the THIRD war of Danish Succession only proves that this diplomatic action is being abused by Denmark. Regardless, at some point, Poland and Denmark entered into a Royal Marriage. When Denmark’s king passed from this world there was a dispute between whom from which nation shall claim the throne. Poland felt it their right to settle this matter through war. So POLAND declared war on DENMARK. And since Muscowy is allied with them it was our obligation to stand by our friends. At some point in the past FRANCE guaranteed DENMARK’s freedom. And so by involving themselves, France also brings her vassal states PROVINCE, LORRAINE, TRIER. Likewise, AQUILLA, a strong ally of France, was also called to arms.

And this is the pronged threat from the west. Countries in which we have no normal dealings with are now pitted against us because of the Barbed Web of Diplomacy. Luckily, there is enough of a geopolitical buffer between us and them that this poses no real IMMEDIATE threat, but their reputation, might and sudden involvement has caught us off guard.


The second tier of opposition is cause for much greater alarm. It involves the blunt force of our cursed enemies directly to the east: The Golden Horde.


Here is how they wiggled their way into this conflict: The Golden Horde strategically WARNED Poland. Plain and simple. Knowing that Muscowy was allied with Poland and would very likely enter war beside them it is ever apparent that the Golden Horde had their sights on Muscowy this entire time. They too seek conquest. Muscowy is a major obstacle to their progression westward. Even though we have tried to avoid a direct confrontation, alas, through diplomacy we now find ourselves mostly unprepared to fight a war with the Golden Horde's massive armies who are practically kicking down our eastern gates.

Is there a happy ending to this? Indeed. It has been mentioned that diplomacy provides unforeseen opportunities of growth, and that Muscowy currently finds itself in such a position. Hard to believe given how the odds are stacked so heavily against us. But we can - nay – we MUST pull ahead, we must triumph! Our victory involves tactful military maneuvers deep within the Golden Horde’s territory. After which, it will be time for Muscowy to shed its iron cocoon and initiate its formation into the mighty State of Russia!

- Coming soon -
Chapter 3: All on the Line

Dear Brad Copeland,

If you need a refresh: Flight of the Navigator Rave

Yes, Flight of the Navigator is undoubtedly 80’s. There are some surface elements that can afford to be upgraded, but there are also fundamental human elements that should be left alone. Here are some thoughts.

It is worth noting that the script is being written by Brad Copeland. He is most known for My Name is Earl as well as the movie Wild Hogs. I’ve seen only a couple of episodes of My Name is Earl, and from these select viewings I am filled with hope. However, Wild Hogs was a bummer – so, let’s just pretend that this hogwash of a movie doesn’t exist. Indeed. Let us cling tenaciously to the wit that abounds in the scripts of My Name is Earl and give hope that Copeland will be/currently is in this mindset when writing Flight of the Navigator. If nothing else, I’d like to hope that the charm, sincerity and all-out awesomeness of the original movie would be enough of an inspiration to come up with a stellar script.

It is my impression that the remake, if handled properly, could be, among other things, a crushingly amusing mirror of the fads, people, and events of today; a comedy of the present day, in a classical sense. Therefore, I deem it absolutely necessary that the remake keep the math that is utilized in the original: David loses eight years because of the effects of traveling near the speed of light. This is a significant amount of time in a young man’s life, as well as the course of events of this modern time in which we live.

Max, the droneship, may or may not need too much of a facelift. Its exterior’s sleek and aerodynamic design is pretty ubiquitous with what the general populous would imagine a small space craft would appear to be. As for the interior of the ship… Well, again, we’ll just have to trust the art director on this one. I honestly feel that nothing should change. It’s totally rad how all of the systems can be accessed, interfaced with, and emerge from within the seemingly empty silver interior. At the very least, give us the same slow panning shot of the initial glimpse of the interior that the original movie implements – gives me goosebumps every time I see it.

When performing the mind transfer to regain the lost star charts, Max also unwillingly collects David’s human memories. The Droneship’s vocal representation is then transformed from a stale, foreboding timbre to none other than Pee-Wee Herman’s characteristic lunacy. This can, without a single shred of doubt, be replaced in the remake. Napolean Dynamite, or something. Something. Anything. ANYTHING! But, remember, it’s gotta be topical to the first five years of the 21st century.

Dr. Faraday is the head NASA scientist who is most eager to learn from David and Max. In the original movie, this character is played Howard Hesseman – of TV’s “Head of The Class” program. I feel that it would be appropriate for Ed Harris to assume this roll in the remake; really, for no particular reason other than I kinda have a thing for Ed Harris. I dunno. Don’t judge me. Likewise, it would also create extra dimension of drama if Copeland created a 2nd in command to Faraday. This character should be played by Mike Rowe. And since the movie takes place in Florida, and it's hot in Florida, Mike Rowe should be without a shirt in every scene he's in. Don’t judge me.

And let us not forget the soundtrack. From what I’ve come to learn it is Alan Silvestri’s (Back to the Future, Predator – off the top of my head) first soundtrack created entirely in the digital realm. Such an approach was appropriate, and the proof is in the pudding. The soundtrack augments the atmosphere, drive, feeling of the movie. For the remake I foresee a match foretold in the stars: a collaboration between David Gilmour and Sounds From the Ground. The outcome of such a creative effort would yield nothing short of cosmic regality. A perfect sound for a worthy movie remake.

Aside from Silvestri’s music, there is a scene where David assumes manual control of the droneship. He instructs Max to scan the radio waves for some good tunes. After a few rejects they come to “I Get Around”, The Beach Boys’ epic tune that appropriately inspires David to activate the ships hyperockets and zip and zoom confidently through canyons and soar effortlessly through the endless sky. The moral during this brief scene is beyond words and tugs on my heart strings every time watch it. For the remake I would love to see this scene embellished and treated like a full-length music video. Throw in as much CGI as you people want; gimmie zoom shots; turn the inside of the droneship into a party. This is the apex of the story. Have fun with it.

But for all the giggles, laughs, and viewing comfort that could come from a cinematic facelift, I deem it absolutely crucial that the dramatic elements of FOTN remain untouched. David is 13 years old. He is the navigator. He knows where he wants to go, and it’s his choices, his decision-making, that may or may not get him there. Sometimes he makes wrong turns. Sometimes his emotions cloud his judgment. But the fact the he continues onward, unshaken, is a valuable life-lesson.

Flight of the Navigator is a wholesome tale of innocent wonder, coming of age, the desire to acquire knowledge, and familial love that crosses space and time. The ball is in your court Copeland, don’t screw it up.

Drudgery - May 2010 BRR Mixtape Brigade

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=P4WLDGYC

Kalkrut came to a halt. He drew a deep, wheezing breath; filling his giant lungs with the sulfurous bog air. Shin deep in bubbling sludge, he straightened his posture and adjusted the harness that came over his bare shoulders. Arcing backwards, as far as the oblong crag of limestone would allow, sounded out a rapid sequence of hollow pops. Reaching out to either side, Kalkrut grabbed hold of Cyprus trees to use their intertwining root system as resistance to stretch his broad pectorals. He strained and groaned.

After a few brief moments he became lightheaded. He then relaxed and, with great resolve, exhaled, boring a hole through the dense fog; A tunnel which brought hope, focus. But no sooner could these thoughts solidify into something tangible, Kalkrut’s glazed eyes witnessed the fog quickly fill in and once again became homogenous with the stifling blur that was all around. The oppressive grey air seemed to buzz and cling to his hulking physique in retaliation.

He sensed that there was still a great distance to go, and the humidity was sapping his strength; the limestone grew continually heavier; every heaving muscle ached for rest; the gunk in his lungs seemed to churn hotter with each breath; his hands clenched as frustration and rebellion simmered…

And just then, he blinked and quickly recalled the super-charged slaveband locked around his neck - a band that could easily encircle four or five of his puny captors. So, even if Kalkrut had had the strength to remove the rock and hurl it deep into the mangroves followed by a roar of triumph, he would still have to explain for returning to the building site with an empty harness; the penalties of which are far worse than trudging your way through a bog with a two ton chunk of limestone strapped to your back. Likewise, at this thought, he felt his weight cause him to sink deeper into the muck.

He ran a hand down his bald head and flicked globs of giant sweat into the murk. He slowly closed his eyes, took another deep breath, and with the strain evident in his facial expression Kalkrut pulled a bare foot out of the bog’s stubborn suction and took a stride forward…

Best keep moving.